Thursday night, God met us in the midst of our challenges. He met us through some very precious friends. He met us when we most needed hope. Here’s the story, in the context of the thank you letter I wrote to them on Friday morning…
Dear [Friends],
Last night, while I was making dinner, Tobias ran out to check the mail. For the few minutes he was out of the house, I was trying to concentrate on dinner, but my mind kept going to our adoption process. It is an understatement to say this has been a tough season. So, I was in the midst of thinking and hurting and doing some processing when Tobias returned. He walked into the kitchen and, without a word, handed me a lovely beige and light yellow card. I could immediately tell it was a card about a baby, a mom, and a dad. So, I go into self-protection mode and pray, “God, give me strength of steel to deal with yet another baby announcement.”
I began to read the card and realized it was written to me and Toby. In this moment, the words on the page became a balm to my soul. I did not make a sound, but I started to cry. I could not speak. I just stood there with tears running down my face.
Then, I saw your check.
I was leveled.
Tobias and I stood there in the kitchen just holding each other, crying.
Over the last few weeks, both of us have been dealing with the ups-and-downs of this process. It is not fun. Most expectant moms are planning showers, choosing items for their baby, having pictures taken of their growing bellies, and sharing special moments with the expectant dad, family, and friends. Most expectant dads are telling funny stories about their wife’s cravings and hormone changes, dreaming about their son or daughter’s future, taking the pictures of the growing bellies, and sharing those special moments filled with excitement and anticipation. Instead, Tobias and I are doing paperwork, making phone calls to see if there are any birthmoms interested in us, managing adoption agency processes, and raising the $38,000 it will cost us to bring our little one home.
In the midst of this, I have had moments where I wanted to quit. I wonder if we will ever be chosen, if we will indeed hold in our arms the child that is in our hearts.
All of this was weighing on us as we stood in that kitchen. Right at that moment, when it seemed this particular week – this particular moment – would overwhelm us, your card arrived, as if carried by the hands of angels.
Your words brought encouragement and fanned into flames the smoldering wick of hope I was desperately holding on to. I have repeated psalms 113:9 to myself, over and over again, knowing that the God who has done mighty things, does still do mighty things, and will do mighty things for us.
We will never be able to thank you for the exceedingly generous gift. Thank you simply cannot convey the gratitude we feel. I only have a few truly great desires in my heart. The first is to know and love Christ with all I am. The second is to know and love my husband with all I am. The third is to be a mom and raise a child to know and love the Lord and walk with Him always. How do you thank people who help fulfill one of the greatest desires of your heart? Words are insufficient. No actions can express the thankfulness. So, we are left with simply saying “thank you” and asking the Holy Spirit to translate this meaning as only He can.
Kelli and Tobias
—–end of letter to our precious friends—–
We have $29,000 left to raise to reach our goal.
Kelli
